Promise

They promise you butterflies blossoming in the pit of your stomach; they promise you nights left awake with the sun shining through your windows at 4 am; they promise you of blissful words whispered into your mind to remind you of every inch of their extravagant soul; they promise you thoughts would build you a mansion of fairytales about the both of you; they promise you masterpieces of smiles and melodies of laughs that will fill out your hours and days; they promise you the reality of forever whenever you hear their name or catch a whiff of their addictive scent; they promise you that it's absolute heaven on earth, that hell will no longer have a place when they're by your side. 

They don't tell you about the rotting gunshots to your heart after it ends; they don't tell you about the nights the sun burns and blinds your eyes to the point of permanent insomnia; they don't tell you about the screams inside your head reminding you of the soulless name you beg yourself to forget; they don't tell you the mansion is built in the middle of a hurricane that is sent to destroy every last bit of your future hopes and dreams;  they don't tell you about the laughs that fade into echoes and smiles are replaced with tear stained lips; they don't tell you that promises are not made of concrete but instead are knives sharpened to fit perfectly into your skin, to slice you open to bleed every time their name knocks at the doors of your ears; they don't tell you that heavenly love is just hell in disguise, waiting for the perfect moment to be exposed in order to burn you.                                                                            @M657_

People often..

people often look at old pictures with tears in their eyes,

I read old self written words with cracks in my heart,

people often call their old actions regrets that weren’t wise,

I cling to decisions that scar me as if they were art,

people mourn the old text messages they’ve received,

I mourn lies you’ve engraved into my skin that I once believed,

people often reminisce scents that inhabit forgotten & abandoned clothes,

I ache at memories that become a permanent perfume right under my nose,

people often sweep the pain under the rugs of their plastic homes,

I watch my pain grow wings and stab each part of me as it roams,

people often forget the letters and syllables of people they deeply bury,

I fight each hand not to write your name on torn papers as I grow weary,

people often smile once rusty memories turn into cool evaporated air,

I dwell each sleepless night because the thought of you keeps my mind bare,

people often forget the lyrics you used to sing with a smile on your face;

I draw the shape of your lips onto my skin as if it were pieces of lace,

people often choose to live and forcefully let go,

but before you, life was something I didn’t know.

Two different worlds

two worlds that collided in limited time,

two souls that only know how to be free,

you were my other end of the line,

growing too attached was always a crime,

you gave me a new pair of eyes to let me see,

that just the sound of a voice could taste better than wine,

we shared anticipated dreams and hopes each night,

we silently fought a war we loved to ignore around each other,

we were not okay but with each other we were fine,

we both ache for our own kind of escape with all our might,

two worlds so different yet so calm with one another,

two ferocious waves rushing in two different directions,

a storm and a blizzard destroying its own varied troubles away,

two human beings who needed a good friend, not just some lover,

a friend that would embrace their flaws; not just expose their needed corrections,

a friend that would still call no matter what they needed or wanted to say..

in a universe like this we both have endless possibilities to discover;

after all, we are both two airplanes with different flying locations;

with the same hope of landing right next to each other one day;

because we have yet to feel so many more exhilarating sensations,

with one another, in every breathtakingly beautiful way.

A home that's empty

I wish my chest wasn't a black hole I use to suffocate my pain away. I wish my eyes weren't windows to a home that's empty. I wish my lips weren't a painting of a beautiful smile that wasn't skin deep. I wish my skin wasn't a page of words that were in a language that couldn't be read. I wish my fingers weren't locks that had no keys. I wish my lungs wasn't an oxygen tank filled with weights. I wish my mind wasn't a maze that knew no end. I wish every part of me was free of this mismatched puzzle that couldn't blend. I wish and I wish but nothing could ever make any of this fade away. In all of this there is no breakaway.

You will never know this

My words of you are letters I never sent. You will never know how many letters I've forced together to paint your face through them. You will never feel the emotions I attach to each paragraph. You will never read the pages that I've stained with my tears. You will never realise that the most beautiful of letters are letters that spell out your name. You will always be deaf to my unspoken thoughts I've engraved into each inch of the papers. You will never know how numb my fingers become when they clench the pen after every sentence that calls out to you. You will never know how many times I've ripped the novels I wrote to you. You will never understand that destroying my words will never destroy my memories. You will never know.. you simply will never know. 

Maybe..

Maybe she's blind because all the places she's been to have your face drawn against their walls.  Maybe she's deaf because all the songs spell out your name; no matter what symphony or note she focuses on. Maybe she's heartless because she's numb to everyone around her but you. Maybe she's stupid because she only loses hold of her sentences and words around you. Maybe she's lost because she can only find herself in maps of you. But then maybe, just maybe.. she's just endlessly in love with you.

I need you

I need a real person, I need a real story and not a fantasy from disney. A prince charming is not what I desire; for he is a man that doesn't remember the face of his princess. Fairy godmothers aren't what I want; for they are only flawed humans that only grant wishes with expiration dates. A vibrant ball gown isn't a dress that would fit me; for it is only a beautiful mask that will cover my flaws. A tiara won't blind reality; for it is only a lie created to intrigue you. A famous love story doesn't interest me; for it is only a fictitious rehearsed plot. I don't need any of these myths so many people choose to believe. What I truly need is you.