Chapter 27

"Shoug.. allah yikhaleech la tebcheen. I can't stand hearing the one I love cry, please 3shani Shoug.." I was shocked once I heard his words, I quickly lifted a finger to find a few tears had escaped. I hadn't even noticed them.

And wait what?!

The one you love?

He loves me?



Before I could question him any further, I heard a door knob turn and my heart was about to explode out of my rib cage. I quickly hung up on S3ood and watched my mother, along with my brothers behind her, walk into the house. They had pained expressions on, they looked pretty tired.

"Shoug? Shisawya ga3da ehnii?" Mom looked at me, confused. Huh? I checked my phone and saw that 2 hours had passed! I didn't even notice the time fly when I was on the phone with S3ood. I quickly changed my phone's profile to All Alerts Off, just in case S3ood tried calling me again.

"Oh, uhm, madre. Maleit men dari," I shrugged and stood up, I hurried upstairs to my room to avoid anymore questions.

I checked bbm and saw multiple messages from S3ood.

S3ood Al-X:
Sh9ar? ;s

S3ood Al-X:
Shoug? .. did I say something wrong? ;(

Shoug Al-X:
La la!! Ome radet el bait m3a M7md w Khalid, so sorry! x_x

S3ood Al-X:
Ohhh, 7mdellah! =)) Khare3teeny. Shoug?

Shoug Al-X:
Halla?

S3ood Al-X:
I miss your voice already.

What should I say? What did this mean for us? All these questions were clouding my mind but my heart was beating fast. I felt a pang of sadness that was surrounding my heart, I didn't even notice it until I was alone in my room. S3ood's voice made me feel safe, he made me feel secure and loved.

I'm going to regret this someday. 

Shoug Al-X:
I miss your voice too S3ood..

My eyes failed me that night, I couldn't stay up any later and I fell asleep, I hadn't told S3ood goodnight but I had a feeling that he knew I fell asleep that night.

The next day, I was disturbed by a loud noise. My eyelids felt stuck together, they wouldn't open. I groaned and tried smacking my phone once I figured that the noise was my alarm.

"Rise and shine Shoug!" I heard Lisa-Anne chipper, she pushed the beige curtains aside and let the blinding rays of sunlight fill up my room. I groaned even louder.

"SHOUG, YOU WANT ME TO CALL MAMA?" Lisa-Anne threatened, I jumped out of bed and went on with my daily morning routine. Lisa-Anne had to use that threat every morning to wake me up and it worked successfully.

I arrived at school and the girls surrounded me, pestering me with the same question.

"Bitiyeen el 7afla?!" Lulu asked.

"Coming to the party?" Dalal hovered in front of me.

"SHOUG! BITIYEEN, 9A7?" Loura yelled out, even though she was only 10 centimeters away.

"HEY, ARE YOU COMING?" I heard Basma yell out too from behind.

"BANAT! CHUB!" I shouted and that silenced them all. I laughed once I saw their shocked expressions, they saw me laugh and their expressions softened.

"What party?" I asked, confused.

"Ma shiftay el broadcast Fajer sent out?" Lulu asked once everyone was quiet.

"I didn't check bbm today morning," I smacked my hand over my forehead, I forgot to check if S3ood had messaged me that morning. I didn't want him to think that I was ignoring him.

"Okay so Fajer is holding a party on Thursday at 7pm, it's mixed. Check the BC lema etrideen el bait 3shan takhtheen el3enwan," Dalal said. Wait, what? Mixed?

"Mixed? As in, boys and girls party?" I asked, confused.

"Eeeh!" Loura answered excitedly.

"Ome ma ra7 tir'9a, et3rfounha!" I was surprised that the girls were all going to the party, I'd never gone to a mixed party before and I'd never even thought of going to one. I saw Fajer approach us once she heard our conversation.

"Shoug! Laaa, LAZIM tiyeen." Fajer clinged to my arm, begging me.

"Fajer, ma agder.. fee 9bayan!" I looked at her, disapprovingly.

"Shd3wa, they won't rape you. My parents will be there too! And the boys there will be from our year, la etkhafeen!" Fajer looked at me weirdly, I was the only one that had strict parents in the group.

"I'll ask my mom 3shanich, but don't get surprised once she says no. Just saying." I rolled my eyes at her, Fajer's parents were half Tunisian and half Kuwaiti, so she had a more free minded family.

The day passed quickly. For the first time, my lessons didn't seem to drag forever since I kept day dreaming about the party. I knew my parents were going to say no, I was worried they'd be angry at me for even asking for such a thing but I'd told Fajer I'd ask for her sake, so then she would see that I wasn't trying to make up excuses to skip out on her party.

In a way, I was also happy that Fajer had created a distraction for my friends, no one asked about why I was so distant over the weekend and I wanted to pretend that nothing was going on for a while longer.

Once I was back at home, I grabbed my blackberry from my bedside table and dialed my mother's mobile number. She was back at the hospital again and so I waited impatiently for her to pick up the phone.

"Aloo?" Mom's voice sounded groggy, I probably woke her up from her nap.

"Yuma, adre bitgouleen la2 bs 3shan rafeejti 7anat 3lay 7ena mu 6abee3eya. 3ade arou7 7aflet Fajer Al-X youm el khamees?" I asked, already knowing her answer.

"Youm el khamees? Ma ra7 etkouneen t3bana? You have school on Thursday." Mom asked in a worried tone.

"Oh, neseit agoulich. It's teacher's conference day on Thursday, so no school that day."

"Ooh, 3ayal ee, rou7ay estansay 7bebty." Mom sounded hopeful that I was going to have some fun after yesterday.

"Bs yuma, fee 9bayan bil 7afla. 9bayan men medrisetna." I told her, there was a stretched out silence during the phone call. I knew that my Mom was thinking about it.

"Ana male sh'3l, rou7ay s2lay M7md etha tigdireen etrou7een." I was shocked, she wanted me to ask M7md?

"Uhm.. okay...?" I was still shocked, she hung up on me after saying goodbye. I was nervous on asking M7md, I knew that he would be even angrier than my own Mom. It's now or never Shoug.

I approached M7md's room and knocked on it till he told me to come in.


"M7md, adre bitgoul la2 bs rafeejti 7anna w lazem..." I was talking so fast, I was blabbing uncontrollably.

"Shoug, haday shway!" M7md laughed at me, "Ana al7een sima3t ene fee 7afla youm el khamees w fee 9bayan, 9a7?" I looked at him and nodded nervously, too scared to speak out.

"Brou7kom?" He asked, M7md was sprawled on his comfy looking bed, his attention on his iPhone and on me at the same time. To this day, I'm still surprised that my own brother could multitask.

"La2, omha w obouha biyig3odoun m3ana w el 9bayan men medrisetna." I repeated Fajer's words.

"Hmm.. okay, bs shar6. Ana bawadeech w Lisa-Anne bitkoun m3ach, okay?" I stared at M7md blanky. Did he just say yes to a mixed party?

"Shfeech et6al3eeny chithe? Ma etrou7een brou7ich!" M7md misunderstood my stare, he thought I wanted to go alone without a chaperone.

"La la mu chithe! .. Bs enta min9ijek? Gilt eeh?" I was still staring at him.

"Eeeh, shd3wa?" He looked confused. I nodded and left his room, still shocked.

I bbm'd the girls and told them that I was going to go to the party. They were all ecstatic.

I've seen pictures in the last few years on Facebook with the school's mixed parties, they always looked like they were having so much fun. I never envied their free minded families, I was used to hearing bad rumors about the parties and things that went on in them.

So I was pretty much scared of attending my first mixed party, I wasn't sure I wanted to but I couldn't lie to Fajer. I was also interested in seeing what actually happened in those parties rather than always hearing gossip about them the day after it.

The week dragged on by slowly, me and S3ood's conversations grew longer and we'd now bbm each other whenever we could (so pretty much 24/7). We never called each other after our first call, the house was always vacant since the family would be at the hospital from the morning till the late night. I couldn't visit since I had school, my mom had made that pretty clear and I didn't want to argue any further.

Although the house was always vacant, I didn't use this as a chance to speak to S3ood on the phone again, I started to feel guilty about calling him. My brother had trusted me and let me go to a mixed party, but what if he found out I was on the phone with his friend's little brother on the phone just a few days ago?

Fajer Al-X:
PING!!
PING!!
PING!!

Fajer Al-X:
Weinich? YALLA! You're late. ;(

It was 7:15pm and I still wasn't done with straightening my hair. I ignored Fajer's pings and tried to straighten my hair faster. I wore a frilly black dress that had sleeves on and it reached down to my knees. I fastened a red belt around my waist since the dress was flowy. I decided to wear a more casual dress, not too baring but not too conservative either. It was something I'd wear to my grandmother's house. I had on winged eyeliner that shaped my almond eyes and a coat of colourless lip gloss on my full lips.

My brother and Lisa-Anne were waiting for me downstairs. I hurried down whilst clutching my caviar Chanel purse.

"Laish ma libestay el a7mar?" My brother looked over my dress.

"Kan eg9eer," I thought he would have praised me for choosing a less baring dress.

"Bs kan a7la.. Weeh, yalla, we're already late anyway. Mu giltay el 7afla yabdy elsa3a 7 bileil?" Me and Lisa-Anne followed M7md to his car, fastening our seat belts once we were inside.

"Eeh, bs 3ade! No one goes to a party early anyway," I was always late so I never had gone to anything early before, but when I showed up, usually most of the people were already there. I always told myself that this was because everyone arrived late like me.

I gave M7md the address and we arrived outside the white painted house. There were multiple cars outside the house and people were still entering the house. I could hear the blaring music outside. M7md walked inside the house with me with Lisa-Anne trailing behind us, looking at the party decorations in wonder. The house's lights were switched off and there were disco lights everywhere. It was blinding my eyes as I walked inside.

I was surprised at how many people showed up. I recognized a lot of the people, they were all from our school and they seemed to dance freely with the other girls. Their bodies weren't too close to theirs, they were dancing to fast paced techno song that was blaring out of the speakers.

I couldn't find any of the girls, M7md was looking around the lavish house, taking in it's huge dance floor in the middle of it. I noticed a lot of the people's eyes were on me and M7md. Lisa-Anne was right behind us but it was obvious she was with me. I suddenly felt embarrassed that I'd had to show up with two chaperones.

"Weeh 9ej yahalo," M7md smirked at my fellow students, he continued: "Yalla ana barou7, digay 3lay etha tabeen shay, okay? La et6awleen, w deeray balich 3la nefsich." And then, he was gone.

Me and Lisa-Anne stood awkwardly next to each other, I couldn't find any of the girls from where I was standing. I decided to explore the house, I slipped into the bathrooms and greeted a few girls I knew from my classes. I discovered a living room inside the house, Ahmed, a Kuwaiti guy I knew, was sitting on one of the beige couches with at least four girls sitting next to him. He looked really happy.

I laughed at him, he was harmless and he was a joker in class. I escaped the living room and found my way back to the dance floor.

"Shoug! Dance with us!" I heard Jenny call out behind me, I couldn't figure out how I didn't notice her before. She was wearing a skirt that barely covered her thighs and her glittery top was too tight. She was with James and a couple of other non-Kuwaiti girls that wore the same baring outfits. I smiled at her and pointed to the bathroom to indicate that I had to use it. She waved before I turned to the other direction.

I bbm'ed the girls and Lulu had told me that they were all on their way together. I figured that Lulu had picked all the girls up in the same car and so, this took a lot of time.

I decided to go back to where Jenny was and I tried to dance but I awkwardly failed. I couldn't dance properly in front of these guys, it felt weird. Jenny was moving her body all over the place, not caring who saw her. The music was causing my eardrums to want to explode, it was too loud and the songs were horrible. The guys kept changing the songs from techno, rap then back to techno again.

In the other corner, there were guys trying to take pictures of themselves with the other girls. I noticed that they mostly just took pictures. Now I knew that a party wasn't always so fun behind a good Facebook picture. I bbm'd Fajer countless times but she never replied, she was probably somewhere else, hosting her party.

"Shoug! Over here! Come join the picture!" Greg called out, smiling at me. My gut told me no, I didn't want my picture everywhere on Facebook. I smiled politely at him and pointed to the bathroom again, it seemed to be the best excuse to get out of an awkward situation.

I checked bbm and saw S3ood's messages. I told him I was going to a party in Bayan but I never mentioned that it was mixed.

S3ood Al-X:
Bayan? Bayan block #, house #?!

Shoug Al-X:
Eeh.. shdarak? ;s

S3ood Al-X:
 SHOUG. GET OUT OF THAT PARTY NOW! :@


I couldn't reply to that message just yet since I heard loud disturbing male voices behind me, I turned around to see who was causing the big racket. I saw older guys joining the party, they looked unfamiliar. College guys. College guys at a high school party?

I noticed one person that was with the large group of college guys.


Jassim.


And then, I noticed a girl's arm around his.


I couldn't believe my eyes once I saw who the girl was, that was holding onto him so tightly..